When I was running out of my house, a pillar fell over me. I found my legs were caught under the rubble and I could not free them. I shouted and shouted for help, and then I heard my younger sister call my name from far off. Then she cried, "There's a fire around me!"
As I was struggling under the debris, I saw my books were scattered about. Among them I found "Philosophy of Life," a book written by Mushakoji Saneatsu, which I was quite impressed with when I read it as a high school student. It lay just in front of me, but you know it didn't help me at all to get out of this situation.
At school, they would encourage me to read books and I myself would believe it was very important. However, I now have doubts whether it'll do me any good to read books when I live my life. I am too embarrassed to call myself a nihilist, but I feel like denying what I used to believe in.